Ok so my sister had the twins yesterday by C-Section.
Baby A was born at 3:08pm weighing in at 3lbs 13oz while stretching to 16.5 inches.
Baby B was born at 3:10pm weighing in a 3lbs 8oz while stretching to 15.5 inches.
The adoptive parents are calling Baby A Bailey Bradie and Baby B Kendall Wayne. Now please understand that BOTH babies are girls. So the names really don't fit and it's upsetting because in no way do they honor or related to the birth mother.
The whole thing is just very hard. These are the first two little ones that are really my little nieces. These girls are my flesh and blood and all that jazz and my sister is giving them up for adoption. And it's not that I don't like the adoptive family, but I got to see the little ones and they are adorable. All 10 little tiny fingers and toes with limbs that move and stretch and such big dark eyes (my mom says they're blue and I say that they're more brown than blue). They're gorgeous! (The hospital wouldn't let me take pictures of them since they're in NICU cause they're so little.) And they should be coming home to the family and getting smothered in love and spoiled by everyone. But my sister is bound and determined that she can't handle twins or babies and that she's not ready.
I really wanna tell her to grow up. That if being a mother right now wasn't in the plan for her life she wouldn't have gotten pregnant. I wanna tell her that she's being stupid. I wanna tell her that she is ripping our mother's heart out. I wanna tell her that she's shredding mine to pieces. But I can't. I promised my mother that I would stay out of it, and I am, as much as it sucks. I just wish that the birth parents would stay far away from us. That they would give us the space we need to basically mourn cause that's what it feels like. Every time I see the adoptive parents another little piece of me dies inside cause it's real, the babies aren't coming home where they belong. The babies are going away and we'll never see them again.
And it just really sucks.
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The trials, tribulations, and mind wandering comments of a woman trying to find out where her place is in the world.
2 comments:
I can imagine this would be a very difficult situation to face. I can't imagine how hard it would be to say goodbye to two little girls like that. I'm sending my best thoughts your way!
I also cannot imagine how hard this must be. I send my thoughts and prayers. Though it is a hard perspective to embrace, do try to remember that although your sister made the mistake of an unplanned pregnancy; she is making the greater and better choice of having the two little girls. They will grow up and live beautiful, long lives with parents who probably have been wanting children for a very long time. Although it seems selfish to give up children for adoption-it's really one of the most selfless decisions can someone make.. to be able to recognize one's own weakness and objectively think about what is best for the child, is truly a remarkable thing. I see great strength in your sister's decision and believe God will bless her, and these little girls for it.
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